Day 1 December 2, 2008
Posted by tharinid in Self discipline.3 comments
Well, the first rule of my diet plan is already broken as of this morning. I woke up after a very disturbed night of sleep, and felt tired and crabby. And I went for the coffee. This should give you an idea of the kind of task I am up against, in lieu of myself. But as a sort of penance, or detailed observation or whatever you may call it, I really watched how my mind worked to carry the resolve away. It told me over and over how tired I was, and how I needed that coffee to get going. (I usually wake up more fresh and energised than today). It told me how it was just one cup and I could do the rest of the things right. And before I knew it, I was apologising to my self and saying….just this once.
There are still some things I got right in all of this. I really enjoyed my one cup of coffee, mindfully. I relished the warmth stealing down my throat and the feeling of relaxation. I was totally in the moment when I had my coffee. And then after, I observed how it made me feel. It was not altogether pleasant. The warmth was replaced by this unfresh feeling in the mouth, which made me want to brush again. And yes, I do feel a little bit more fresh, but of course, this is the caffiene kick working.
If I should not repeat this tomorrow, I need to educate myself on whether coffee really interferes with weight loss or not. And so, i did. Through this article. And more specifically, these words…
“If you are “running on empty,” getting your “energy” from artificial stimulants like caffeine, you never really get to understand the effect your food is having on you. You never know whether your food is producing energy and alertness or tiredness and fatigue. You’re masking the effects of your eating style with an overpowering stimulant. And that’s keeping you from valuable knowledge about what foods work for you and what foods you ought to stay away from.”
And that does it for me.
A week of discipline… December 2, 2008
Posted by tharinid in Self discipline.4 comments
Spirituality needs discipline. This is a known fact. And over the course of this last year, I have seen just how much I lack in it. A resolve once made, has always evaporated into thin air, at the very next opportunity that it was challenged. So much so, that I have stopped taking myself seriously. And this lack of gumption to see something through is slowly eroding whatever is good and latently good within me. And I really need to get a grip on myself, and come back to the path that I long to be on.
The first of the many challenges, has to do with diet. I need to lost at least 20 lbs and soon. I am 31 now and getting into middle age. And I want to get back in shape before lower metabolism levels take over and make it tougher than it is. I have resolved many times to myself on some of the changes I wanted to make. Simple, basic things for a diet overhaul…like, no coffee and tea, more water, less dairy, only the occasional dessert, and 1 hour of exercise at least 5 days a week.
And everyday, I have failed. And I am tired of failing. And I realise the only way to get what you want, is to go after it, mindfully while asking for grace along the way. Plus, I need to firmly commit myself to change. And that is what I am doing here, right now. So starting tomorrow, for the next 1 week (yes 1 week alone)….I want to institute these changes with determination and strength. And I want to see how this one week impacts me. If at the end of it, I feel good about the changes, then perhaps, I will have the energy of positive impact to carry me into the next week, and the next and the next. For now, it starts with tomorrow.
God grant me the strength and bless this resolve of mine.
